Hello Fall

I am one pair of crotch-wrenching pantyhose away from becoming a 1960's housewife. Although some aspects of that lifestyle would not be that bad...such as; not having to work......I can't think of any others.

I have cooked, cleaned, washed laundry, and am currently sitting on my couch with no pants on and curlers in my hair. It is Saturday night and I've spent the past hour trying to convince myself that this is perfectly acceptable behaviour for a 25 year old married woman.

Fast forward to Sunday.

I find it quite amazing the amount of work I put into cooking dinner; especially after having a few drinks. Though I do not condone drinking to excess, I fully support its use in becoming a happier and more productive member of society (within reason). Personally, I use alcohol to just not give a shit; dishes? No problem. Paying bills? Absolutely! Talking to people you definitely wouldn't carry on conversations with sober? Of course! This is when alcohol can become such a great companion; on the flip side, it can leave you in tears crying in your 1994 Mazda Protege to your husband about your "issues". Not the finest of moments.

Saturday night did not turn into much, my hair ended up looking like a post-sex follicle romp and my PMS (which has worsened each year??) took the better of me. I ended up watching Lord of the Rings on teletoon and eating half a bag of crispy mini's dill flavour; carbicide.
 I woke up this morning with yesterday's makeup on and some sort of  blonde animal growing at the back of my head (my hair). Note to those wanting extensions, get a weave. Saying "my weave is tangled" is much more badass than explaining why your "clamp extensions have dried out." Just sayin.

Though I am a full time student and work full time, my "google search list" begs to contradict that statement. Throughout my life I have come to accept that I am eccentric, often OCD, a mental terrorist, and quite stubborn the majority of the time, I never thought that my life could be summed up by simply looking at my Google search history.  I thought I would share what I came across; keep in mind, these searches are only one week old:


Canada post Penticton
Side effects of dairy allergy
Unique Baby Names
What is a group of deer called?
Tegan and Sara new album
Diplomat cake recipe
Jessica Simpson's baby (I was trying to convince Fraser that this could quite possible be the ugliest child)
Trichotillomania
Deena plastic surgery
French Bulldog
Cesar millan's dogs names
Cesar millan Mr.President
Cesar millan's dogs
Cesar

FUCK.

This is Mr.President, not sure why I needed to search four times.